October 30: Laffen SS

Dear Sam, Since our original Hitler list contained more than a few clunkers, I've reprinted your excellent list. Any other contributors out there? Now a floating Hitler meme - that's something the American people might get behind (if we can just find somebody who wants to shut us down). Sincerely, simpleton

Dear simpleton, I'm pretty sure that today's issue redefines bad taste. I may be forced to: a) Change my email signature ii) Not send any email today Bruce brucek@reef.com Please read http://www.simpleton.com so he'll leave me alone...

Dear Bruce, I was actually expecting some umbrage over this one, and hesitated about running it, but was forced to act when I read an article praising The Residents for their daring decision to put out an album called Third Reich and Roll. At that point I decided people have been getting away with this Hitler dodge way too long. And where lesser men would have sat silent before tyranny, simpleton acted. Sincerely, simpleton

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An Invitation

Dear simpleton, Me and my friends are Exhibitionist and would like to show you how naughty we can get. You can see us Live and spend some Free time in our special little private rooms. You will be viewing us with a big viewing screen and fast clear video just like T.V. There are also 3 Live Rooms where you can see me and my friends 24 hrs a day. Plus there are hundreds of wild streaming videos, pictures , games, and stories. If you have a Quickcam you can plug it in to your computer and we can see you as well. Me and my friends would love to see you.!!!! Doing you know what @@@@. Hurry up and visit our website, me and my friends are desperately waiting for you. http://38.216.110.215/eskimo.htm P.S. Me and my friends will also do a two girl show for you!!!! XOXOXO Alyssa ksantos6@hotmail.com

Dear Alyssa, Listen, me and my old lady are into this kind of shit, but what say we skip this lame quickcam and streaming video and all that and just get right down to laying some pipe? I mean, don't get me wrong, I'm Mr. Foreplay and all, it's just that this watching it all on computer ain't my bag. I mean, don't get me wrong (jeez, how many times am I gonna say that, huh?), I'm all for watching, and you and your friend sound like you got some holycrap imaginations. So, you know, anything goes. You can even bring a guy along - I know the Mrs would grok that, cause she gives as good as she gets, you know what I'm saying? We're way openminded. So we should definitely have a good time, since we're all consenting adults and everything - I mean we are all adults here, right? (heh heh) Oh, that reminds me of something I heard one time at the old perverts home: "One time I had a nine-year-old with the body of an eight-year-old." ;-> That's just a joke of course. I'm not even remotely into that kid thing. I mean to each his own, and you know our society is soooo uptight. Grass on the field = play ball, that's my philosophy. But if I were into something underripe (not that I am, just supposing) I sure wouldn't say it here. Cause, I mean for all I know you could be a cop or something, right? And fuck, you're probably thinking the same thing about me. And who can tell, cause we haven't even met (is this online, cyber hightech shit a total mindfuck or what?). Which brings me back to square one. I think we're all on the same page with this stuff, but let's can the internet garbage and do it in person. Really, what beats a little one-to-one action (or 6 to 1 action for all we care ;->)? So give me a call, doll. We'll definitely make some shit happen. XOXOXO Buzz Perskie